two steps forward one step back
2010-09-08, 2:21 a.m.

a skinny man in the park spoke to me in spanish even though i said i understood english better. he seemed like an old version of f. *my crazy libra ex. i think that's why i kept talking to him. he kept saying, "every day i ask god why" it was very dramatic. he showed me his cryptic tattoos (prison quality but cool symbols) and told me he was a prophet and his daughter's name was mary magdalene. since he wanted to speak in spanish, i couldn't really give any encouraging words. i just asked questions so he wouldn't think i didn't understand him. i think he was crazy. i gave him all my laundry change. then he said that he would pay me back next week, like we were good friends and i didn't remember. he kept pointing at his cigarette and saying "this is not good for me, it's shit" but he kept it in his hand until it burned to the filter.

i deleted half a page of my thesis and then i wrote a half page so i still have two pages. ugh. good night.